The Gravys 2024: Roast Dinner Awards

Skip The Nonsense

Welcome to The Gravys 2024, the new name for the Roast Dinner Awards.

This year the awards are split into two posts, The Gravys, where all the good stuff is mentioned.

And then there will be The Elon’s, for where all the myriad of moronic roast potatoes will be cremated, if they weren’t already cremated on the plate.

I reserve the right to choose another name.

2024 has been more a year of Gravy Analytics leaking your information than proper gravy on a roast. It was the joint second-worst year for roast dinners, with an average score of 6.95. And the most expensive year at an average price of £24.95.

I only had 7 roast dinners that I’d strongly recommend, with a score over 8. There were 8 that I’d strongly recommend avoiding, even more than the alleged body odour of Donald Trump.

So, over Christmas, I sat down in a proper dive bar in Hull, with my regular accomplice, and discussed our year of roast dinners. And then questioned life a bit more.

Shall we crack on with The Gravys 2024?

The Best Pub With The Name Rose And Crown

Somehow, I went to three pubs called The Rose And Crown in 2024, so it feels fitting to start with an award to my favourite Roast And Crown. I mean, Rose And Crown. And that actually was misspelled accidentally.

One was a Young’s pub in Wimbledon, so you can probably imagine the bland crud I was served there.

One was in Clapham, where I waited 90 minutes to get my roast dinner and then they wanted their table back before I could even consider dessert.

And then the other one was miles away, on the outskirts of Enfield.

But actually, The Rose And Crown in Enfield served a really good roast dinner, melt in your mouth lamb, actually crispy roast potatoes, good veg, meaty gravy. 2 hours and 14 minutes to get home though.

Best Ceiling

OK, this is obviously a bit of a nonsense award, similar to “best producer” in the Oscars, like, nobody cares about the producer.

It was a poor roast dinner, and absolutely nobody should consider eating here.

However, if you are in the area, The Old Bank Of England has a bloody excellent ceiling.

Best Service

I didn’t book Old Compton Brasserie in Soho because I expected it to be amazing – it was just somewhere central and convenient.

We did get a very serviceable roast dinner, however it was the service that really stood out, thanks to George, who really should be on stage somewhere.

Our accomplices had been there a little longer than us, and one was just complaining to me about how bad the service was, when up pops an outrageously camp and jolly fellow called George, “well hello there darlings, what brings you to this town?”.

He asked where we were from, and when “Hull” was mentioned, he snapped “GET OUT”. Wise.

And then whether we were celebrating anything (the people next to us were celebrating their dog’s birthday, I think), of which I reluctantly replied I was celebrating my 300th roast dinner, to which he was something like “yeah and I bet you have a spreadsheet detailing it all”, and I was like “I actually have a website”, “shuddup, no you don’t”, “oh yes I do”, “oh no you don’t”. He did offer to sing to me if I really had a website, but thankfully that didn’t happen.

He was a lot of fun.

Best Atmosphere

Probably the final award before we start talking about food – believe it or not, I did enjoy some of the roasts in 2024.

One place that was even more fun than the front row of a Kier Starmer speech, was Albert’s Schloss in Soho.

It was Christmas, so good vibes are guaranteed, but even outside of that this place spells F.U.N. with bands, dancers and various performers, and all the staff seem to be happy and enjoying life in there.

Sure, there were issues with the roast dinner, few places in 2024 didn’t have issues. But for a Sunday Funday with a decent enough roast dinner, then Albert’s Schloss is the place.

Your Mum Made This

A fairly newly added award, the “your mum made this”, celebrates the roast which seems most homecooked. Sure, the meat might be burnt, seasoning forgotten, herbs an alien concept – but it feels good despite.

It was, of course, an Irish pub that wins the award – The Claddagh Inn, in Hendon.

There was LOADS of food – like, you ain’t eating this over the course of a week on Ozempic. And sure, the Yorkshire pudding was from a bag, and the vegetables were basic…but this helps towards this particular award.

Yet some of it was really good, especially the beef, which fell apart, the gravy was half-decent too, as was the mound of hidden mashed potato.

And I had a beer for £4.00. In 2024. Granted the roast dinner was £24.95, which ain’t especially cheap.

Most Left Of Centre

For some reason, the most popular way to discover my blog through Google in December was the search term, “Indian roast dinner”.

You don’t have to accept this as a roast dinner, if you don’t want to. I’ve made my peace, I have bigger problems to solve in the world, like how do I remove Vladimir Putin from power.

However, it does have most of the constituent parts – meat, roasted potatoes, veg, gravy. Banging masala gravy in fact, along with a roti which kind of substitutes for a Yorkshire pudding (just don’t tell anyone from Yorkshire). And absolutely tons of flavour.

And for those not following the trends in the roast dinner world, the winner is The Tamil Crown.

Best Carrot

You can tell that we are in business, when the conversation turns to best carrot of 2024.

I’ve had as many carrots as I’ve had roast dinners – considering they cost about 10p each, no wonder they end up on every single roast dinner.

One was particularly memorable, a long chunk of carrot at The Hillgate in Notting Hill.

One long glorious whacking chunk of carrot, roasted and seemingly charred on the grill at the end, the flavour of the carrot was brought out well, it tasted fresh and quite sweet – though I think without sweeteners, ie honey.

Best Vegetables

Finally an award where I have multiple contenders. Confirm that when I get around to The Elon’s, there are also plenty of contenders for awards like “worst roast potato” – in fact, I think Excel ran out of columns.

Runners-up include L’Escargot who produced some really gorgeous, buttery cabbage.

The Rose And Crown in Enfield had just really good veg – I even enjoyed their red cabbage.

The Tamil Crown’s mixed veg avial was superb, even if it does break roast dinner rules in having avocado and cucumber in there…gosh…wait until GB News proclaim this the most woke roast dinner ever.

But the winner is Sussex Bar & Restaurant, particularly for the cabbage which was rather on the luxurious side, buttery and peppery – exactly how I enjoy cabbage. But also the carrots were superb, and the flavour of the parsnips actually wowed – far more flavour than most parsnips.

A worthy winner.

Best Cauliflower Cheese

Mostly cauliflower cheese is something that pubs/restaurants offer on the side, and I’ve slowly trained myself that I don’t actually need a side-dish with a roughly 1,200 calorie meal (and possibly well over that, especially in Irish pubs).

Though I’ve also trained myself that I don’t need 6 pints of beer on a Sunday…yet like cauliflower cheese and the average Manchester United player, training can be forgotten.

There’s a couple of places that were pretty close to being a winner, one was St John’s in Archway, with a proper cheesy, creamy mixture, replete with mustard seeds.

The other runner-up is WB Yeats in Finsbury Park, the only Irish pub to have served me a roast dinner that didn’t look like an extra large from Toby Carvery, and their cauliflower cheese was perfectly cooked, with cheesy-cream and some chives on top.

There is a stand-out cauliflower cheese though.

The cauliflower cheese at Roe in Canary Wharf was outstanding – it was as cheesy as you’d hope, fairly luxuriously creamy – with chives, the crisped kale and something similar to parmesan, maybe parmesan, on top.

It was a proper dish into itself. Roe, roe, roe your jacuzzi boat to Canary Wharf.

Best Cannot Be Arsed To Do Roast Potatoes

2024 started off looking like the year where pubs and restaurants were just not going to bother doing roast potatoes.

Even for my birthday roast, in highly-praised The Parakeet, they deemed that Sunday to be the Sunday they’d try fingerling potatoes instead of roast potatoes.

HOW DARE ANYONE NOT PROVIDE ROAST POTATOES ON A ROAST DINNER. Especially on my birthday.

But occasionally, someone protests roast potatoes and actually…I quite like them.

Enter WB Yeats in Finsbury Park:

According to ChatGPT, these were not roast potatoes – they were toast. They were kind of like glorified square-shaped chips, with a crispy edge and a fluffy middle – they were rather delectable.

But better to provide decent roast potatoes cooked on the same day.

Best Roast Potato

Hmmm.

Erm.

Shall we move on?

Ooooh let’s maybe talk about Brexit instead…

Finding someone who believes Brexit has been a success is nearly as easy as finding good roast potatoes in London. Though it isn’t too difficult to find pubs that are deluded into thinking roast potatoes cooked the night before are worthy of serving, nor is it too difficult to find people that think Brexit would have been a success if only it had been done properly.

There are a couple of places we can talk about. Roe in Canary Wharf was pretty tops, crispy on the outside, soft on the inside, some flecks of herbs. And then for more of a surprise, The Boot in King’s Cross served crispy roast potatoes par excellence on the outside, soft in the middle – though for a downside they did taste a little bit too much of the fat they were cooked in.

Yet I’m going to be predictable.

Look at the chuffing on those…yes…you know where this is, Blacklock in Canary Wharf.

Thankfully, in a world of dwindling morals, ethics and decent roast potatoes, Blacklock still served the goods. Crispy edges not always evident but more or less towards crispiness, though they were properly fluffy inside, and good quality spuds too.

Best Yorkshire Pudding

E by gum, it’s time to talk the best of Yorkshire, like your host, Lord Gravy – a fine Yorkshire specimen.

Well, the best Yorkshire pudding anyway.

And despite the plethora of burnt yorkies during 2024, there are a few worth mentioning.

The Collab in Walthamstow provided a pretty excellent yorkie, and a touch of humour advising that they “should only be served with beef really but if you are an absolute heathen you can have one”. I am an absolute heathen but I did actually have beef too.

In most other years, I think The Great Chase in Islington would win – crispy to an extent on top, and really fluffy inside.

But 2024 wasn’t most years, it was the year of bone marrow in yorkie, at least at Sussex Bar & Restaurant.

You had to upgrade to this, which cost, I think, an extra £2.00, however the combination of bone marrow and crispy yorkie was dreamy, and adding bone marrow to a yorkie was genius. Technically, the fluffier yorkies were previously mentioned, but none of them had bone marrow.

Sexiest Meat

You’ve made it to the sexiest part of the post.

The Sub starting to insert the huge cucumber in her vagina…hang on that was the description of the image I nearly used…Flickr does have some interesting images tagged as “sexy”.

However, I can talk even dirtier than that. Baby.

There is a really clear winner for this, however props must go to some divine beef rib at L’Escargot – yeah the French can do decent roast beef, who knew. I had some almost sensational lamb at WB Yeats, impressively rare though a little lacking on volume, silky, melt in your mouth lamb at The Rose And Crown in Enfield and some delectable porchetta at Roe, which was a herby delight – if only the crackling had been crispy.

Also a special mention to the pork knuckle at Albert’s Schloss which was a monstrous slab of pork – and possibly the best crackling of 2024. Yet I can do better.

The Collab in Walthamstow served this ridiculously holy shit glorious beef rib. Hearty to taste, so succulent and fell off the bone so easily. A mixture of tender beef, some gooey fat…and, well it was just holy shit glorious. The rest of the roast was pretty mixed, but the meat…well it was the sexiest meat of 2024.

Best Gravy

Folks, sad news. You may already realise but the world is going backwards.

Yep, we are going back to the days of infinite watery gravy, and heck – even jus has made some appearances once again in 2024.

I can think of just two times in 2024 that the gravy impressed me.

And one of those is Blacklock – if Blacklock start doing watery gravy then we might as well hand the whole of fucking Europe to Putin and Trump, hey maybe through Slough into the deal too.

The winner of best gravy, which wouldn’t win it any other year, is, and with absolutely no conviction on my part, The Boot in King’s Cross.

It was meaty and herby, with a good level of consistency – even if it probably had been warmed up in the microwave. And there was no shortage of it.

It probably was the best gravy of 2024. But that doesn’t say much, I’m afraid.

Best Roast Dinner

There were some very good roast dinners in 2024. Not many, but some.

The Tamil Crown for their is it actually a roast dinner Indian special.

Roe for the delectable porchetta and superb cauliflower cheese.

The Rose & Crown in Enfield, a mission of a trip but a really damn good roast dinner – and proof that I’m still willing to travel across London for you.

L’escargot for the wonderful service, excellent dining room and superb beef rib.

The WB Yeats for near sensational lamb.

And Blacklock in Canary Wharf – because of course. These can all pretty safely go on your to-do list, assuming you call travelling to Enfield as “safe”.

But the winner of the best roast dinner of 2024 not only had the award-winning best Yorkshire pudding of 2024, stuffed with bone marrow, but also perfect carrots, gloriously buttery cabbage, super flavoursome parsnips, fluffy roast potatoes, really tender pork and pretty good gravy.

The winner of best roast dinner for 2024 is Sussex Bar & Restaurant in Soho. You can book it…and you don’t even need to wait 6 weeks for a table as it hasn’t been hyped by anyone other than little old Lord Gravy.

I’ll be back with a look back at the worst roasts of 2024 at some point…Joe Biden was US president when I started writing The Gravys 2024, though I guess Elon Musk will still be US president when I start writing The Elons.