The Laundry, Brixton

Gather your dirty knickers, folks, it was time to go to The Laundry in Brixton.

This week’s roast was location-dependent, as we needed to be in Brixton – and with nowhere on my to-do list in Brixton, the challenge was to try to use Google reviews to find somewhere decent to go for a roast in Brixton.

Challenge being the operative word, given this was rated 5 stars on Google:

A really shit roast dinner, with new potatoes, that I found on Google Maps
Screenshot of Google Maps

I was quite taken by the idea of going to Effra Social, given that it is in a former local Conservative Club (cannot imagine why it wouldn’t still be a Conservative Club…surely the Tories are popular in Brixton?) – but they don’t do roasts in summer. Don’t…do…roasts…in…summer.

Yeah, I hear you, “what summer”. But really you should be questioning why somewhere doesn’t do roasts in summer. It isn’t the only place – The Larkshall in Chingford I wanted to go to the other Sunday, but they do “summer BBQ roasts” complete with fingerling potatoes. That’s a no from me. And then I looked at booking Story Cellar for an upcoming roast – they too don’t do roast dinners in summer.

One day I’m going to turn up somewhere that I’ve booked, and they’ll stare at me blankly when I ask for a roast dinner, “but don’t you know it is summer?”. No, I don’t, but I do know Sunday is Sunday roast day.

Washing Away The Tories

Before I go any further, I just want to say a heartfelt thank you to Nigel Farage, and offer my sincere congratulations to him.

Thanks to Nigel Farage splitting the right-wing vote, only 20% of MPs belong to a Brexit-supporting political party.

BOOM! Cheers, Nige!

Champagne bottle of Tory Tears, and beer barrel of Reform Tears - extra bitter.

Granted re-joining the EU any time this decade is still probably about as likely as me offering a score of 9.50 for a roast dinner…also any time this decade. It certainly didn’t happen this week – I’m sure you can tell by the photo.

The Laundry had Megan’s vibes to it – my suspicion was of more style than substance. And then there was a question on arrival – do I want to sit inside or outside? Outside was under an awning – useful given that it is July and therefore pissing down with rain on and off.

I chose outside, after being advised that it was more vibey than inside, though I feel I had enough vibes on Thursday night:

Meme about someone getting very excited for every Tory that lost their seat

Though I’m kind of sad that Liz Truss lost, as it would have been hilarious to see her run for Tory leader again. How is she going to save the west now? She’s only got 9 years and 10 months left.

Washing Away The SNP

We were sat on a table right next to another table, so close that it felt like we were dining with them – curiously they were a Spanish couple. Hola!

The beer choice at The Laundry was not amazing – I struggled through a Brixton pale ale or two, though I guess I should have been soothed by it being just £5.00 a can. That’s a good price, right?

Sunday roast menu at The Laundry, Brixton
© Copyright – Roast Dinners In London 2024

It was a choice of chicken at £26.00 or beef at £28.00 – I’m not entirely sure why I ordered the chicken, perhaps to save £2.00. There was no real reasoning, and I was assured by the lady serving us and pretty much running the whole of the outdoors (and perhaps Brixton itself) that both were good. She was really rather excellent throughout.

Alas, someone decided that we all needed roasting too – the awning was already stuffy, but someone decided to switch the heat lamps on, as if we were all Yorkshire puddings destined for a plate 6 hours later. Amused by being under a heat lamp in July, I was not.

And then I had to eat a roast dinner under said heat lamp.

This roast dinner:

Chicken roast dinner at The Laundry, Brixton
© Copyright – Roast Dinners In London 2024

Starting with the carrots (which could be my catchphrase), on the plus side they were nicely buttery, but on the negative side they were a bit too al dente for me, and had a weird sweetness – which I couldn’t quite put my finger on.

And that was it for the vegetables.

Washing Away Jacob Rees-Mogg – YES!

The roast did also come with peas, but you likely know my thoughts on that, and I guess you could count the watercress as a vegetable if you want.

Chicken Sunday roast at The Laundry, Brixton
© Copyright – Roast Dinners In London 2024

You might think the roast potato count ungenerous for a £26.00 roast dinner in Brixton, however they did bring round extra carrots, peas and roast potatoes later on.

They were something of a mixture – some were really crispy but not quite soft enough inside, though probably were excellent when they were made. Some were more notably tired, and one or two were quite freshly made and crispy.

I gave up on the Yorkshire pudding as it simply tasted of burnt.

Roast potatoes and chicken at The Laundry, Brixton
© Copyright – Roast Dinners In London 2024

I thought that the chicken was strange – cut into two parts, the breast and the thigh. The former was remarkably flavourless, bar some kind of vague chargrilled vibe on the top. Also it had a kind of toughness of being undercooked, even though it hadn’t been undercooked.

The thigh was better, though that is like saying that immigration policy under Labour will be more humane than under the Tories, t’was ever thus. Also helped by my deciding to break my anti-condiment vibe, and spreading the garlic and chilli butter on top.

As well as bottomless veg, The Laundry also offered bottomless water. So do all restaurants, you may think, however this water was masquerading as gravy. Not only was it watery but it was annoyingly sweet – perhaps just in my opinion, but you are here to read my opinion. Infused with caramelised onions – the gravy wasn’t getting my vote. Yes, I did vote Labour, and I did have a word with Lady Thatcher on the way home to explain my reasoning. I think she understood.

The Laundry

Unusually, myself and my regular accomplice differed quite strongly on our opinions and scores for The Laundry, for she liked the sweet gravy, and her beef, scoring it a 6.90.

I’m not sure I really liked anything, bar the occasional crispy roast potato.

The gravy I disliked the taste of, plus how watery it was, the yorkie just tasted burnt, the chicken was odd and the carrots too crunchy. As proven by my regular accomplice, I think some will enjoy it more than others, and the Spanish woman on the table right next to us was effusive in her praise for her first ever roast dinner. I wasn’t, though of course I lied when asked about it, and said it was “good”. I was way too hungover for any conversations otherwise.

It’s possible that I’m being a bit harsh here, but I’m scoring it a lowly 5.31 out of 10.

Yep, the first roast dinner under the Kier Starmer era is a rank disappointment. Things can only get better? Sigh…I’ll grab my toolbox.

I’ll be back next Sunday, all being well, at a British restaurant where I will apparently be surrounded by love. Gosh there’s a load of shite written on their website. Hopefully the roast won’t be too. Toodlepip.

Fair use – general election
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The Laundry, Brixton

Station: Brixton

Tube Lines: Victoria

Fare Zone: Zone 2

Price: £26.00

Rating: 5.31

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Loved & Loathed

Loved: Woman serving us was superb, and they came round later with extra veg/roasties.

Loathed: Watery gravy which was too sweet, yorkie tasted burnt, chicken a bit flavourless

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