Kudu Grill, Nunhead

I nearly put “South Africa” instead of Nunhead…yeah Kudu Grill, is a braii restaurant – and host of Lord Gravy’s great potato replacement theory adventures this week.

But first, a note for anyone racist, anti-Muslim, anti-Semitic, homophobic, etc – or anyone even vaguely excusing or apologising for the fascist riots.

FUCK OFF.

This blog is not for you.

Go to a Wetherspoon’s and ask for a roast dinner. You won´t get one, as they haven´t served them for 10 years, but you don´t deserve one anyway. Roast dinners are (well…can be) British cuisine at their finest, and anyone who even vaguely excuses fascism on our streets, let alone takes part in it, is not British, does not have British values and deserves to eat peas for dinner. Ideally, in prison.

Also:

Do You Do Kudu

Well, it feels about time. About time to discuss the Great Replacement Theory. Mainstream media won’t acknowledge it, but I’ve seen, and eaten it with my own eyes.

Enough is enough.

The British people deserve better.

Stop replacing our roast potatoes with new potatoes, or fingerling potatoes.

Granted, Kudu Grill advertised this as the case, unlike The Parakeet who decided to “try out” fingerling potatoes…on Lord Gravy’s birthday no less.

The Great Chase, last weekend didn’t even attempt to make their new potatoes decent (how I haven’t been lynch mobbed for reviewing a halal roast in the current climate, I’m unsure, or I would be unsure if more than 9 people had actually read the review).

And then there was the abomination by The Lock Tavern…for which the cold, dry potato wedges were one of the least bad things on the plate.

I Do Voodoo To You

BREAKING NEWS. We have trouble in Hull also.

No, I’m not talking about those sexy women from the City Of Culture, one of whom apparently just wants a quiet life, according to her Facebook profile, though also has a conviction for stealing a 91 year old woman’s engagement ring. Salt of the earth. Genuine concerns.

Of course, I’m still on the subject of the great potato replacement theory. This just in, from Hull (well, a village that is definitely not part of Hull):

A roast dinner in Hull...with new potatoes (and roast potatoes)

Two new potatoes sneaking in on a small boat at the back there.

Yeah, I know, all potatoes matter. But I’m an ordinary working class roast dinner reviewer and I have genuine concerns.

What Kind Of Hoodlum Do You Do

I’ve been wanting to go to Kudu Grill for years. Partly because I ate kudu at a South African restaurant in Wimbledon about 20 years ago, and it was just utterly sensational. Like, some of the tastiest, most tender meat ever.

So they pretty much sold me on their name. Alas, no kudu on their menu.

In fact, since I put it on my to-do list, they seem to have opened up two more restaurants – Little Kudu and Curious Kudu. The former, doing South African tapas – biltong, Boerewors and Braaibroodjie (no idea what this is, but sounds like a cool BBQ/party), the latter doing shared private dining or whatever that is.

Outside Kudu Grill, Nunhead

I was at Kudu Grill, instead, their signature restaurant, and the one with the Sunday roast on offer.

An old Truman’s pub, they hadn’t done much to the outside other than paint it a weird slate grey – kind of looks a bit crap from the photograph, a bit of a waste of a frontage. But inside had warm vibes, solid chairs with dark green cushioning, some stripped back brickwork, some blue tiling – and an open kitchen in the corner.

The welcome was also warm and friendly, plus they were playing some really nice house music – out of good quality speakers. It drifted towards more tribal beats later, one guesses of an African original, and that was pretty cool too.

Beer choice was pretty boring, just a Brixton lager or a pale, though the wine list was more interesting – I took a recommendation on a Pinotage which was rather excellent, though at £14.00 a small glass, it really fucking needed to be.

Potato Voodoo

Sunday roast menu at Kudu Grill, Nunhead

As much as it felt like a miracle to be paying under £30.00 for a roast dinner, I then recalled that I was in south London. £28.00 for a beef rump in south London really is a bit ouch, as is £26.00 for pork belly or £24.00 for celeriac.

Given that I managed to clock up a bill of £55.00, plus I guess around £10.00 on train fares, for a roast dinner, a glass of wine and a beer…solo dining…did make me, possibly for the first time, question why I don’t occasionally have a week off. Especially when I’m on my own.

I went against my usual preference of pork belly, and my suspicion of beef rump, and ordered the beef.

Beef Sunday roast at Kudu Grill, Nunhead

Shall we start with the carrots? Of course we shall, and these were mixed in terms of crunch, nicely charred yet also quite buttery.

I did rather enjoy the tenderstem broccoli, they had a charming smokiness to them – though were just a tad too much on the crunchy side for personal preferences.

Topping off the vegetables, more or less, was half a shallot. Surprisingly sweet, though perhaps shouldn’t have been given that the menu advertises them as “fondant shallots”. I quite appreciated the balance of the vegetables, there was some thought here.

Bored Of Thinking For Headings For You

OK. So, great roast potato replacement theory time.

Close-up of fingerling potatoes at Kudu Grill, Nunhead

I did at least admire their efforts to get these crispy – they really were crispy, like triple-fried chips kinda crispy. Yet in terms of flavour, they were rather earthy – they didn’t really taste of anything I’d expect, or hope for. They were a bit of a chore.

Enough is enough. No more woke spuds.

The thing on the plate that you might think is a really bad Yorkshire pudding, was actually sweetcorn bread. Which was like eating a cupcake with gravy. Which I have done, many years ago, and if all my photos were on Google Photos then I could probably use their AI search to find it, but fuck am I paying Google to store my photos. Like, the temerity of a company worth $2 trillion, using the vast reserves of data it has on me to serve me advertising, that then says, “nah too many photographs, pay us £1.59 a month”.

Close-up of beef at Kudu Grill, Nunhead

You’d hope that a South African restaurant would do good meat, and in terms of flavour it was fairly top notch, a really welcoming smokiness that encouraged me to slow down and savour it. Alas, the other aspect slowing me down was that the beef rump, a cut I’m normally suspicious of, was on the tough side. The fat wasn’t quite rendered enough, it didn’t feel like the most amazing quality ever – and I feel a cut like rump is better cooked slower.

I dearly wished Kudu Grill would have offered something more than rump to showcase their abilities, sirloin for example, or the dream – kudu. Not to be.

Finally, the jus – for something advertised as a jus, it actually was quite reasonable. I’ll always prefer a proper gravy, but this wasn’t too far off. A bit herby, a fairly weak flavour overall – but that arguably works better when you are dealing with smoky meats.

Kudu Grill

I broke a mirror in the morning before going to Kudu Grill, which I guess condemns me to 7 years of shit roast dinners, though I’m hoping this can be back-dated.

Kudu Grill was another mixed affair – they certainly can flavour their meat well, and I appreciated the diversity, equality and inclusion of the vegetables.

But then there were those fingerling potatoes…which whilst I’ve had worse roast potatoes, offered no enjoyment. And then the cut of beef just was nothing special either. It feels a bit like a missed opportunity – I’m generally assured from experience that most proper restaurants do better meals Monday to Saturday then they do roast dinners. But I did think Kudu Grill might have persuaded me to come back another day…and this didn’t quite do so.

I’m in two minds as to whether to score it just below or just about a 7.00, which is the dividing line between where I like more than I dislike about the roast – you’ll see on my league table that I have far more in the range just above a 7.00 than below, which is possibly my kind of kind heart.

For Kudu Grill, I’m going just above, and a 7.04 out of 10.

I’ll be back next week, hopefully somewhere a bit more affordable. And with a bit of luck we can talk cheese hugs instead of fascist thugs.

My Grandma still asks if I’m ever moving back to Hull.

(Visited 21 times, 1 visits today)

Summary:

Kudu Grill, Nunhead

Station: East Dulwich

Tube Lines: National Rail

Fare Zone: Zone 2

Price: £28.00

Rating: 7.04

Get Booking

https://www.kuducollective.com/kudu-grill/

Instagrim

Loved & Loathed

Loved: Played good music, Pinotage was very nice, friendly service, beef was smoked really nicely, as was broccoli.

Loathed: Beef was quite tough, and not the best cut ever. Hidden sweetcorn, and fingerling potatoes were too earthy.

2 responses to “Kudu Grill, Nunhead

  1. Hello.

    Happy New Year.

    A group of 45 people from Korea is coming to London.

    Is it possible for the group of 46people to have dinner on January 24.2025 5:45 pm?

    Is there a menu available at the price of £25 per person?

    I look forward to your reply.

    Best Regards
    Hyun Joo Min
    +358 50 461 6667

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *