Myself and my most trusted roast accomplice set out to have a tourist day on Sunday, by walking over Tower Bridge (the glass ceiling thing), so that we could practice our Instagram selfies, maybe taking us to the hallowed point of being able to sell any old shit like Belle …
Fuck Democracy. That was the subject of an e-mail I received last week along with someone’s life story, who for some reason has a disdain of democracy. I don’t quite know how anyone could have anything but the highest respect for democracy as of late. Not only was he suggesting …
Ladies and Gentlemen. This week, in the national interest, I set out to review a Sunday roast at The Foresters Arms in Hampton. Chosen by random number generator which apparently according to arch-Brexiter, Steve Baker, is a suitable way to choose a Prime Minister. There are many ways I could …
You may recall that some time ago, I became rather upset that I didn’t get any roast potatoes when I had a roast dinner at Temper. I wrote to them. ****** Dear Sir/Madam There are a lot of things missing from my life. Perhaps most importantly, Margaret Thatcher. Barely a …
Welcome to the latest episode of what shite can I write to make a roast dinner sound interesting. Though I definitely have something to say about the food this week. Maybe I’ll just crack on with what I’m supposed to be doing – reviewing the roast dinner at the East …
Any idea how I should start this blog post? No, me neither. I guess I should start with a thank you to everyone that nominated and/or voted in the People’s Roast Vote. Hopefully you found it no more boring or annoying than I did. The result was hardly a surprise, …
Orgasms. Remember that trend? I mean organic. Remember that trend? For those of a millenial bent, back in the early to mid 2000’s, it suddenly became very popular to get nanny to take little Jacob to the local organic produce store for fertiliser-free triple-priced artichokes for breakfast. Kind of like …
Have you noticed that I’ve got a new look? No, I haven’t had a sex change – I’m still the finest non-Asian Drag King from Slough. Maybe you noticed that the pages had broken – nobody could access the to-do list, league table or maps. No, you didn’t notice? Well, …
This week the random number generator picked The Rose in Fulham. Yes, first sentence and I’ve already told you where I intended on going…check that out SEO gurus. Maybe it is a sign of me becoming sensible, and writing mature, intellectual reviews. Oh shit I’ve reached 800 followers. Don’t you …
Normally I like to think that the number 1 rule for being a food reviewer is not to bullshit. However, I have now realised through experience that the number 1 rule is actually be capable of eating. As despite only having eaten the grand total of 1 Gregg’s sausage roll …